The day I was moving out of the dorms my freshman year of college I walked by the trash hall, there was boxes upon boxes, there was art supplies and what seemed like mountains of treasures that could be made into something awesome yet everyone was moving and needed to get the clutter out and with that, I took it in... One item in particular... a 5ft by 5ft canvas and ever since that day I have carried it with me being a staple piece in my life.
When I took the canvas it had a stick figure and a car water colored on it with 3 stab marks from a samurai sword, at the time my girlfriend and I wrote hidden messages/jokes on it and covered it in red paint... As years went on and through moves and new relationships it traveled with me but after breaking up with someone they took a knife to my art and with this piece they not only carved into my wall but created 2 elongated cuts in the canvas... giving it negative energy, 3 year ago I took it off the wall and started over painting it white and stitching it back up, by stuffing the marks with translucent purple cellophane and red embroidery string making it into a yin yang piece taking all the good and bad things that had ever been said to me or physically done to me and wrote it on the canvas.
For almost a year in a half I have had fabric draped over it for it has been to painful to look at even though there are a lot of good things there is a lot of darkness and my true self on it which is hard to process since I like to displace my pain... because honestly the pain I have could swallow a sea... and no one wants to see that... But like I have said as an artist you pull inspiration through everything and some of the best things ever created have been through the darkest times... But I want to take the fabric down and take this canvas to the next stage... I want to show what I have moved onto because as time moves on so do the feelings that were once left behind... And as this canvas has been there, has seen the truth of me and my life... I will continue to be truthful to it, forever morphing into something new hoping to find the beauty in the darkness... So today I take away a part of my mask as I move on from the hate and pain that has left marks on my life much like this canvas.
Today:
Song: Daughter: Landfill
Quote of the Day: “You will never influence the world by trying to be like it”
Fav Food Consumed Today: Pub Dog at Elliott Street
Craving: Apples dipped in yogurt
Drinking: Moscow Mule
Random Fact: I love British accents but someone who can’t use their indoor voice while explaining their life story of fb should really get a hello kitty clue that no one cares... even if you’re hot.
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